God is God – And I Am Not!
“When my little sister comes, we’re going to do this! When my little sister comes, we’re going to do that!” I happily prophesied, as only a four-year-old little girl can, while I played with my dolls amongst the clothes and shoes in my mom’s closet.
Oh, boy… Thought my mom, greatly pregnant with her third child. I’d better nip this one in the bud.
“You know, Laura, we don’t get to choose if we get a boy baby or a girl baby. God just gives us whatever He thinks we need,” she presented logically.
Not deterred in the least, I slammed my fists onto my hips and declared, “Well, SURELY, GOD KNOWS we don’t need another little boy!”
The fact that I did get another baby brother not too soon thereafter only makes this childhood story even funnier. As an incredibly opinionated preschooler, I was sure I knew what was best for our family and it certainly wasn’t another crazy little boy to follow me around all day! Anytime I made similar prophesies growing up, stating with utter confidence that God was going to acquiesce to my way of thinking, my mom was always quick to remind me of this particular anecdote.
I STILL Think I Know Better Than God
You’d think by now I would have learned my lesson about expecting God to cater to my wishes, but I still often find myself putting words in God’s mouth and thinking He’ll simply play along. When I was pregnant and asked if we wanted a boy or a girl, I often replied (or at least thought to myself), “A girl. God knows I couldn’t handle a boy!”
Now that my “baby” is a rapidly-becoming-too-grown-up 2-year-old (girl, thankfully!), I’m frequently asked when we’re going to have another child, to which I joke, “Oh, I’m pretty sure God knows I can only handle one right now!”
Or when someone inevitably asks if I want a boy to “even things out,” my quick retort is always, “Nope, I just keep praying for all girls!” Erik is forever reminding me to be careful what I say, because God may decide it’s time to teach me a lesson again!
A Painful Reminder
My devotion this morning centered on the idea that “God is God, and I am not,” citing Proverbs 21:30:
“There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the Lord.”
The devotional author asks us to think about times we do well at submitting to God in our daily lives and about plans we’ve made that weren’t in line with God’s plans. Then, it asks the inciting question, “How can you learn to accept God’s plan more readily in the future and teach your children to do the same?”
CRUNCH!
Yeah, that was God just slamming a big ol’ hammer down on my toes.
The first example that came to mind, of course, was readying my equally-opinionated daughter for if and when we have any other children and explaining that we don’t get to choose whether she gets a brother or a sister. God just gives us what He knows we need. I really do want my daughter to grow up knowing that God always has her best interest at heart, even when He doesn’t do what she thinks He should do.
When God Doesn’t Give Us What We Want
I was reminded of this post I wrote several years ago about my most vivid encounter with God not giving me what I wanted, and how I still have to relearn this lesson over and over again. My spiritual amnesia on this particular subject is stronger than just about any other idea I struggle with. I just can’t get it through my thick head that God is in control, not me. I may have it in my head how my life should pan out, but often, my view of my world is very limited. Only God can see the complete picture and know what is ultimately best for me and for his purposes through me.
As a former University Resident Director, Career Counselor, Certified Personality Trainer, and high school Spanish teacher, Laura has quite the “scattered” background — with one underlying theme: education! She writes to teach and inspire women on topics related to faith, family, and lifework. She is also a resume writer, specializing in resumes for moms, career changers, and new graduates.
